The end is nigh for the big Rolls and we simply couldn’t turn away the rare opportunity to get behind its wheel at the Millbrook Proving Ground.

We were there because of the annual Test Day which is run by the British Society of Motor Manufacturers and Traders, an all-you-can-eat buffet for motoring hacks featuring most of the latest models, waiting for a quick drive on Millbrook’s demanding hill route.

The company had brought over its full range, but going for the Phantom was -in my mind at least- the only solid option as this was going to be the last chance we were ever going to get to drive one.

Every time I come across a Phantom, I just feel like I need a moment to process just how huge and imposing it really is. Photos just don’t do justice to this majestic beast of a car. Put an S-Class next to it and suddenly Stuttgart’s flagship looks just like another everyday executive sedan.

I grab the thick metal door handle and open the driver’s door. The smell of money hits my nostrils as I climb in the driver’s seat. I try to fit, looking for the seat’s controls while being sandwiched by the steering wheel and the seat. Things get awkward really fast as people gather around to watch a man wedged in the world’s most expensive trap caressing the base of the seat and the door panel. A few embarrassing moments pass before I find them sitting inside the center console. I can finally exhale and close the door behind me.

Whatever you may have heard about the quality of a Rolls Royce is true; every surface is covered by a thick layer of leather, wood or polished metal. Even the fluffy floor mats are made out of lamb’s wool and the minimal, shiny switchgear is something you are only going to find in a Phantom.

Earlier, I kindly asked the person who handed over the keys if I can drive it outside of the facilities, on the public road. “No way”, he says. At least I asked. Rolls Royces are not meant by any means to be driven on tracks or in our case on a narrow road course with gradients up to 26%, huge elevation changes and major camber angles. Millbrook’s hill route is a two-lane torture device for cars and drivers and not to be mistaken for something as enjoyable as a normal track.

Imagine now driving someone else’s half-a-million-dollar 2,5-tonne car and you too are going to be a little nervous at the prospect. I drive off and while my eyes tell me I’m moving, little else gives away that the Phantom is not stationary. As I drive towards the entrance of the hill route the silence and the refinement of the powertrain and that of the ride just force my brain to re-calibrate these values. The eight-speed auto swaps its cogs with unparalleled buttery smoothness and the predictably light steering is surprisingly direct, giving you better confidence on maneuvering the big Rolls. You can even use the Spirit of Ecstasy on the bonnet as a point of reference on positioning the car on the road. Things suddenly look less daunting.

The entrance of the hill route is signified by a short straight followed by a long downhill left. As soon as the Phantom is positioned on the right lane (no driving modes to choose from here), the throttle pedal hits its stop and for the first time I can hear the 6.75-litre V12 working under all those layers of sound deadening.

Even under flat-out acceleration, the refinement is still the star of the show. RR reckons it will hit 62mph (100km/h) from zero in 5.9 seconds with that velvety V12 providing 75 per cent of its 531 lb ft (750Nm) torque from just 1,000rpm and 453hp in total.

The first bit of the twisty stuff limits you in the right lane as the left one is full of speed bumps. The huge Phantom can barely fit in there and driving fast in that section feels like trying to force your feet in a pair of shoes a size smaller. The direct steering allows you to carve the trajectory with precision though and the Rolls stays with you. She doesn’t like it but she’s there.

The body control is very impressive and the brakes prove to be strong and up to the task. Yes, there is body roll, but not in the extent you expect from a car of this girth and weight. It must take a special kind of an idiot on a track to force the Phantom into losing its composure and I will not be that person today..

Towards the end of the lap my eyes catch a blue Audi RS7 Performance nearing up on the rear view mirror. This is getting surreal really fast, but for the sake of a good story later at the pub, I decide I shouldn’t let him tailgate me and my Rolls. The event prohibits any overtaking while driving the hill route, so both the Audi driver and I will gain from this imaginary track battle. The Rolls runs up the hill into a long right corner which dips immediately before it becomes uphill again. The RS7 loses some ground in the first bit, but by the time I’m on the uphill straight he closes the gap. I’m still telling that story anyway.

We enter the most diabolical part of the route, with continuous and sudden elevation and camber changes paired with blind corners. The almost two-meter-wide Phantom starts looking heavier and heavier through that section with its continuous ups and downs paired with a variety of off-camber turns. Lowering the speed of entry improved the situation and the sure-foot feeling of the Phantom returned. Meanwhile my stomach started feeling funny. I’ve managed to make myself carsick. In a Phantom. That’s another story for my book.

I park the car after the lap to take some pictures. I catch myself noticing the perfect proportions of the car, and I just can’t believe that this was the same vehicle that a few minutes ago, made me feel nervous at the prospect of a test drive. You keep hearing all these clichés saying that Rolls Royces are not meant to be driven, but the truth is, despite all of its mega-luxury credentials, the Phantom is a lovely, inviting thing to drive.

The pleasure was all mine, you beautiful beast.

Photos Michael Karkafiris / Carscoops.com

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